What I wish people Understood: I can’t praise away sorrow, and I don’t want to.

I won’t always cry.  But sometimes, sadness and loneliness just need to be felt.  They are the truest expressions of faith in God’s ability to meet me where I’m at. Disappointment, regret, loss… these things can’t simply be prayed away, cast out or replaced with praises and singing.  They are real life companions for anyone … Continue reading What I wish people Understood: I can’t praise away sorrow, and I don’t want to.

What I wish People Understood: God broke trust with me, and only God can fix it.

I remember when your miracle came to life, when we all celebrated God’s faithfulness and power.  I sat in the audience watching, as you prayed for their miracle, and God moved through you.  I was so full of faith, and with you, I was passionate about everyone experiencing what we shared together - God of … Continue reading What I wish People Understood: God broke trust with me, and only God can fix it.

Identify Me

I don't measure up.                                         I don't fit in. I'm too much.                                                   … Continue reading Identify Me

Knowning

When this pain hit, I knew You, Abba God.  A Father, closer to me that my own skin.  But, You let me down.  Where were you in her suffering?  Where were you in her time of need?  Why couldn’t I see You?  Why couldn’t I feel You?  I still can’t… not like I used to.  Even … Continue reading Knowning

Known

Isaiah 45:5-6  "I am the Lord; there is no other God.  I have equipped you for battle, though you don't even know me, so all the world from the east to the west will know there is no other God.  I am the Lord, and there is no other." Psalm 100:3  "Know that the Lord … Continue reading Known

What I wish people understood: This is not something I’ll just get over

I lived with these people in my life for over 20 years.  One of them was a stabilizing presence my whole life... until now.  I won’t get over their deaths in a matter of months, probably not even in a matter of years.  I don’t know that I even want to get over loosing them. I … Continue reading What I wish people understood: This is not something I’ll just get over